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hello and welcome.everybody again to joining us at the.national shrine of the divine mercy here.on saturday.september the 19th live as we come to.you.with our newest topic of explaining the.faith.called marriage divorce and annulments.oh yeah this is a harder topic that not.most everybody wants to talk about.in fact uh you know i know that.i'm gonna get beat up uh i know so i.said you know what i'm gonna be ready i.even brought.some protection here so i said i'm gonna.i'm gonna get beat up i know this but.please understand this is.church teaching i am not giving you any.of my own opinion.and i know as i get pelted and beat up.on these topics please understand.that i am not giving you my opinion but.that only of.christ and the scriptures the church and.the catechism.and canon law so thank you everybody.so just a little levity to begin the day.so as i said let us begin with a prayer.as we all need prayers.to bless our marriages and families in.the name of the father.and of the son and of the holy spirit.amen heavenly father we ask.you send the holy spirit down upon us to.open our minds and hearts to receive the.grace you wish to bestow.and the teaching with which you wish to.give us we ask for blessings upon all.families.and all marriages those who are.in this process of becoming engaged and.getting married and those unfortunately.that who have ended we ask that your.blessing be with all of those involved.and we ask this.through christ our lord amen in the name.of the father.and of the son and of the holy spirit.amen.all right so before i begin i wanted to.point out our next slide this is all.part i'm going to be doing a.continuation of our explaining the faith.series this is this talk specifically is.new so it's not on our first.set of cds but we'll be making new dvds.i said cds i meant dvds coming in the.future.and you can receive these dvds to play.in your recorders.or your players please visit.shopmercy.org.call us at 1-800-462-7426 or stream it.at thedivinemercy.org explaining.the faith all right.so let us get started on this most.important topic you know i should begin.by saying.i do a lot of research before every talk.i.i go back through all my notes i do my.research i.i read canon law i read the catechism.the bible.but i don't think i've ever would put.more effort in for hours and hours as i.did this week.on this topic it's a huge topic.but i'm going to hopefully condense it.for you so that you understand what.marriage is.um and what divorce is when it's allowed.when annulments are allowed when they're.not.again i can't emphasize enough please.don't kill the messenger.please understand everything i'm giving.you today is from church teaching.so let us begin the probably the best.place for us to start.is with the quote from scripture.about what jesus said regarding marriage.and divorce there's a couple places in.the gospel i'll be reading from mark.chapter 10 verse 2 through 10..some pharisees approached him and tested.him.saying is it lawful for a man to divorce.his wife.for any cause whatever he said in reply.have you not read from the beginning the.creator made them male and female.and said for this reason a man shall.leave his father.and mother and be joined to his wife and.the two shall become one flesh.so they are no longer two but one flesh.therefore what god has joined together.no.human being must separate.they said to him then why did moses.command that the man.give the woman a bill of divorce and.dismiss her.he said to them because of the hardness.of your hearts.moses allowed you to divorce your wives.but from the beginning.it was not so i say to you.whoever divorces his wife unless the.marriage is unlawful.and marries another he it commits.adultery wow okay.this is a very tough teaching but again.the words of jesus.let's unpack this for a while and we try.to understand this let's start with our.next slide.what is marriage all right we can have.marriages in many forms i come from a.military family.so you see there's a good example of a.beautiful marriage.what is it all right we just read that.god created man.in his image as male and female this.goes back to genesis right 127.and he said the two become one flesh we.just read that.marriage is a total commitment in love.what is love love is willing the good of.the other.always wishing they're good in all.circumstances.it is a complete giving and receiving.it's not just giving that's why many.marriages fail.because there's no receiving we need.both that reciprocal.giving and receiving for marriage to.work.it's like the love within the trinity a.complete.giving and receiving now don't worry.this whole talk is not going to be.sitting here.telling you that you shouldn't have.gotten a divorce.that's not what i'm about to tell you.today.i'm about to tell you what.is maybe happening in our world in our.culture that is causing so many divorces.and when the church does allow it and.when it doesn't.so again please nothing personal here.let's keep going though.that love being a complete giving and.receiving.um is really a good example of why.contraception.is not allowed by the church people.don't understand that.do you know up into the 1930s every.christian.church forbid contraception.now only the catholic church is the last.one that says that oh father i can't.handle that i can't deal with that.well the reason why contraception is.wrong is because it puts a barrier.between that complete giving and.receiving of love.in the marital act i'm not completely.giving of myself if i'm a husband.to my wife because it's blocked in the.same way.the wife is not completely receiving if.if if there's that barrier of.contraception all right.you know contraception in a way says one.spouse says to the other you know i love.you.but i don't love you enough to have.another one like you in the world.well but father we can't have another.child right now the church.understands that there are other things.like natural family planning.that can address those issues that's a.topic and another talk i'll be doing.called theology of the body.so stay tuned in the following few.saturdays i'll be talking about.sexuality.and the human body and more on.contraception called theology of the.body.all right anyway here's the thing.marriage is.sacred and it is elevated to the level.of a sacrament.that's what saint paul taught us in.ephesians five.okay paul said boy this is the.priest's worst nightmare right when he.has to teach on this.on a sunday homily with a full church.wives be submissive to your husbands.and husbands love your wives as.christ loved the church now i want you.to stay tuned because i'm actually.going to try to tackle that famous.passage.and explain to you i can tell you.i bet you don't i bet you don't know.what would it really.in the sense of what it really means i.bet it's something.different than what you think it means.so stay with us because at the end of.this talk i'm going to explain that.what does christ mean or paul mean when.he says wives be submissive or.subordinate to your husbands.it's not what you think all right.marriage.obviously is a covenant remember a.contract is an exchange.exchange of goods but a covenant is an.exchange of.persons all right and it's a covenant.between a man and a woman which.establishes a partnership.for life now.for the baptized if you are baptized.marriage is indissoluble and nobody can.cancel that bond not.even the church.well father there's divorces in the.church we're going to get to that.so stay with us all right.civil divorce in the government or the.you know the the state.affects the legality of marriage but not.the sacramental.reality of marriage so the church.doesn't get involved.in the civil legal aspect of marriage.but it.does in church law and that's what the.sacrament of marriage is about.all right there is a guy named dietrich.von hilleb-hildebrand who i studied a.lot.in seminary read his book transformation.in christ and others.and he said that we should distinguish.between the meaning of marriage what's.the meaning of marriage.obviously love and its purpose.the purpose of marriage the three.objectives of marriage.and those are we'll get to in a minute.but marriage is one of the three major.vocations you know the other two.the single life and the consecrated.religious life.marriage is one of those huge vocation.callings that most people are called to.now let's look at this let's put up our.next slide.the three objectives of marriage that i.just mentioned.all right what are the three objectives.of marriage they are.unitive or excuse me procreative.unitive and get your spouse to heaven.why all right let's start with.procreation.when spouses conceive new life they.participate.in god's creative power we are to be.procreative that's one of the conditions.for a valid marriage is that it's open.to life.unitive the union makes the husband and.the wife become one flesh.as jesus just said in the gospel we read.all right this is genesis 2 24. you know.i.am i counsel a lot of marriage couples.and i do have to tell you this do you.know.that in every couple that i counsel.there's two things that i see that are.lacking in every marriage that is.failing.and are present in every marriage that.is succeeding.the two things are prayer.and the conjugal act in every marriage.that i've seen that has failed they were.not praying together and they were not.engaging in the marital act.the union and in every marriage i see.that is thriving they are praying.together.and they are engaging in the marital act.a union.all right so now the third is to get.your spouse to heaven.the ultimate love this is the ultimate.love because the love.is defined as willing the good of the.other and there's no greater good than.getting your spouse.to heaven right there is no.way that these three things can't be our.focus in a marriage or it's not going to.work.and so now those three things this is.interesting i did a talk a few weeks ago.do you know that's why jesus said.there's no marriage in heaven.now when i say that some people are like.oh and other people are like.yes there's no marriage jesus said in.heaven we'll be like the angels why.because there's no.there's no need for those three things.there's no need to procreate.because in heaven everybody lives.eternally.there's no need for the sexual union.because again there's no need to.procreate have more children and also.you'll have the perfect union with god.himself.and then third there's no need to get.your spouse to heaven because.once we die we're either there or we're.not we can't change that.now those three things doesn't mean that.we don't have a bond a special bond with.our spouses in heaven.you will that's a beautiful gift but.that's the more.importance of understanding the.objectives of marriage now let's go to.our next slide.this is one of my favorite writers this.is.dietrich von hildebrand and i read his.stuff he's a great philosopher and his.wife alice.um i read a lot of their work had them.in in in courses in college.and i want to talk about their words.about the meaning of marriage remember i.said there's the meaning and then.there's the purpose.the meaning of of marriage is love and.the purpose.is procreative unitive and get your.spouse to heaven.now i'm going to read you a couple.excerpts from what alice.his wife and dietrich von hildebrand.wrote so just stay with me here i want.to read some of these with you.there are a few paragraphs a person.truly in love.wants to bind himself forever.to his beloved which is precisely the.gift that marriage.gives in contrast.love without an unqualified commitment.you know that commitment is marriage.betrays the very essence of love.he who refuses to commit himself or who.breaks a commitment in order to start.another relationship.fools himself he confesses excuse me.he confuses the excitement of novelty.with real happiness many people.criticize marriage because they say it.takes away freedom.they fail to realize that a person.exercises his freedom.when he freely binds himself to another.in marriage doesn't that seem ironic.that you think you're free when you're.not married but actually he says you're.actually freer.when you are married because you bind.yourself to someone in love.he said freedom is not the ability.remember this.freedom is not the ability to do.whatever we want that's license.societies can't function with that that.means people could just kill that will.or.or steal at will it's not freedom.freedom is not the ability to do.whatever you want as i said that's.license.but the ability to do what you ought to.do.and what you ought to do they say is.give and receive.love now sometimes if your spouse is not.reciprocating.that's not your fault and we're going to.talk about that.we must bind ourselves through sacred.vows so that the bond will be blessed by.god.and grant our love the strength.necessary.to face the difficulties of our human.condition this is really powerful.what they're saying is that when your.love is sacred and blessed by god you'll.be given extra grace.to weather the storm all right two small.other paragraphs.in a relationship without sacred.commitment.meaning without the marriage vows.sacramental the slightest.obstacle may be an excuse for separating.unfortunately man who is usually so.eager to win.a fight over others shows little or no.desire to conquer himself.it is much easier for him to give up a.relationship.than to fight marriage calls each spouse.to fight.against oneself for the sake of his.beloved.pretty interesting this is why it has.become so unpopular today.people are willing to achieve the.greatest of all victories.but not when it comes to victory over.self.and that amazing people are not willing.to achieve what is the greatest of all.victories.victory over self saint paul.he went on to say this is my last.section.illuminated the dignity of sacramental.marriage.and calling it a great mystery and he.compared it to the love that christ has.for his.church remember who's the groom jesus.who's the bride.the church this is ephesus or ephesians.natural love pales in comparison.what is natural love love that is not.put under the hand of god natural love.pales in comparison to the beauty of a.love.rooted in christ how do we get that love.rooted in christ the sacraments.as a sacrament marriage gives people the.supernatural strength necessary to fight.the good.fight every victory.achieved together over habit.routine or boredom.cements the bonds existing between the.spouses and makes their love produce.fruit natural marriage.has a love that is earthly but.sacramental marriage.that means the marriage in the church.with god.has love that is supernatural.sorry to bore you with all that reading.but if you listen to those words it's.incredible.let's go on to the next slide what are.the types of marriage there are two.types of marriage.based on what i just read the first is a.natural or an earthly marriage it's like.the justice of the peace.or by the captain of a boat.that doesn't mean that marriage isn't.valid the church does not say that.a church says a natural marriage is very.valid if you get married at the justice.of the peace.the church surprisingly to many people.does not say that's invalid.it's valid but it doesn't have the.supernatural grace of your second one.the sacramental marriage all right.what determines a natural marriage from.a sacramental marriage.believe it or not it's nothing you do.in preparation for the marriage you know.what has everything to do with.if you're baptized or not all right.to get a sacramental marriage.or a natural marriage depends if you're.baptized.now if one or both of the spouses.are not baptized.the marriage is valid but it.is not sacramental it is just.natural or earthly now as long as.there's no impediments of the law.the marriage is still valid so here the.church.recognized the marriage of non-catholics.as valid marriages.in an earthly sense many people say the.church doesn't recognize.it because it wasn't in the church.that's not true the church recognizes.that marriage is an.earthly or natural marriage this applies.to no matter how or where they were.married.in a baptist church or in the justice of.the peace or on a ship out to sea.thus if they had previous marriages.and now they want to marry someone in.the catholic church.they will actually need an annulment.this is surprising i found this out.personally firsthand i was engaged to be.married.i was going to be married to a wonderful.girl in north carolina and she.had a previous marriage and i thought.well gee she wasn't married in the.catholic church i don't need an.annulment well.actually i would have because she was.baptized and married in the baptist.church.so you see the church recognizes this so.they actually need.these annulments now does the church say.that these marriages can be dissolved.well no marriage in essence.can be dissolved jesus just said they.can't be.so we're going to look in a minute what.an annulment says about a marriage that.maybe.didn't have all the elements of a.sacrament.but for right now if you have an.unbaptized person if one is.unbaptized and later they want to become.a catholic.but they were married previously they.can get something called the pauline.privilege which actually can dissolve.the marriage of two persons.if one was not baptized at the time of.marriage.now if both were not baptized there's.something called the petrine privilege.or the privilege of faith and this is.where you can dissolve.a valid natural marriage between a.baptized.and a non-baptized person and i'm sorry.the paul line was if you're both.unbaptized my mistake.so the paul line is if you have both.unbaptized.the pet trine is if one is unbaptized.and one is baptized all right so.we're not going to get into that right.now but what we're going to do is we're.going to jump.to what is the sacramental marriage all.right.if you have two validly baptized people.who get married that don't have any.impediments like.you know they were only 11 years old or.it was a shotgun wedding those are.impediments.as long as you don't have that and you.have a validly marriage.baptized people who were married it is.sacramental.you mean a sacramental father even if.it's not in the catholic church.surprisingly yes.you mean if i my my cousin is baptist.and she got married to another baptist.in the baptist church that's sacramental.yes all right father wait a minute if i.have two baptized people and they get.married at the justice of the.peace that is sacramental.yes surprising isn't it because it's all.determined by.baptism so if you have two baptized.people who get married it is sacramental.this kind of marriage cannot receive a.divorce.based on the words of jesus let no man.separate what god has.joined so how do we explain all this.okay this is where it's going to get.a little tricky but stay with me there.is no such thing as a catholic divorce.okay what happens is called.a decree of nullity we popularly refer.to it as an.annulment but that's actually probably.not the best way to say it we should say.decree of nullity.but for the sake of simplicity today.i'll be saying annulment.so what happens is an annulment is given.to show.that there was actually not marriage in.the first place because there was some.condition.that didn't allow there to be a true.marriage.an annulment shows that something needed.was.actually lacking at the time of marriage.and we're going to go through.that now there possibly also could have.been an impediment.meaning like you know somebody was.already married to somebody else or.they were under the age for a boy 16 or.girl 14.that's an impediment that marriage isn't.valid all right.so even if there was an impediment um.that meaning that they.they weren't legally allowed to get.married and you know by the church's.definition but that does not mean the.children are illegitimate.i'm going to be talking about that don't.worry that does not as i will explain.later mean your children are.illegitimate.even though an annulment says that this.marriage was not.was did not properly occur your children.are not.illegitimate very important if a.non-baptized person.are later baptized so they had a.natural marriage and then later they are.baptized.their marriage goes from natural to.sacramental.pretty powerful stuff huh all right so.let's get on now.to the next slide what makes a.sacramental marriage.father you keep talking about the.sacramental marriage what makes it.before we get into divorce and.annulments it's important that i explain.what the sacramental marriage is then.you'll better.understand what a divorce and an.annulment do.all right a number of elements must.happen.to come together for a valid.sacrament of marriage to occur.all right let's go through this let's.put up our first slide.the elements that must be present.for a sacramental marriage all right.the first is canonical form that's just.a big word meaning you're married in the.church.you're married if you're a baptized.catholic.you need to get married in the catholic.church this isn't my opinion.this isn't me imposing my will upon you.please understand i'm just telling you.what the church.teaches okay but we're going to explain.there's ways that you are.that you can help yourself and don't.don't don't.panic on me because oh my gosh father i.wasn't married in the catholic church.there's ways we're going to help you.to be able to to get through that all.right now.basically canonical form just means.getting married in the church.if one of the spouses is baptized.catholic.not even both just one the couple must.marry.in the church or have permission to.marry.somewhere else now sometimes people say.well father we're first going to get.married in the catholic church and then.we're going to get married in the.baptist church actually.sorry but the church says we can't do.that you can't get married twice.because the marriage in a baptist church.is actually valid.so if you get married first in the.catholic church you can't go get married.again in the baptist church.it's not because the church is trying to.be mean but it's because we can't get.married twice and the church.recognizes that that protestant wedding.is valid.all right this does not apply though for.non-catholics we can't ask non-catholics.to be married inside the catholic church.when they're non-catholics.so if a baptized protestant gets married.in his church.his marriage is still valid in the eyes.of the catholic church.as we said before all right if he.marries another baptized person.it's sacra it's a sacrament or a.sacramental marriage.their marriage would be a sacramental.marriage even if it was at the justice.of the peace.very surprising all right let's go back.to the second of this.list of elements that must be present.they must freely and knowingly choose it.all right we can't have shotgun weddings.or somebody marrying another person to.get them citizenship.neither is considered free consent you.have to freely consent.all right the next one they must.understand.about marriage and this is interesting.that it is lifelong and open to children.a lot of people don't understand the.commitment of marriage.you may be have been in a marriage where.your spouse was immature.or didn't understand the first thing of.what it meant to be the commitment of.marriage.therefore you may have grounds for.something that is not a sacramental.marriage and therefore.grounds for for an annulment all of.these are grounds if they're not present.are grounds for an annulment i'm telling.you what makes up a sacramental marriage.if any of these are not present that.means there's grounds for an annulment.meaning the marriage was not.properly valid not meaning your children.will be a legitimate again i'll explain.that.but there was something missing in the.marriage at the time it took place that.should have been there.that's what we're talking about right.here all right number three.um i just read that they must be also.open to children let's go to the next.slide.all right number four they must intend.fidelity to each other this is a problem.some people marry their spouses and have.no intent in being.faithful and monogamous they continue.affairs or relationships.with other people physical number five.they must have the physical.and psychological ability to follow.through with their intentions sometimes.people are not mentally capable of.fulfilling.the role of a spouse and they dove into.it maybe too quickly.and the church recognizes that if.somebody's been abusive.to you if somebody has been has hurt you.as.or treats you beyond human.um dignity this means that there may not.have been the mental and psychological.capacity in that person.to be your spouse and therefore that.marriage.really truly didn't happen and wasn't.meant to be.i think that's the case many fall into.all right and then number six the.marriage.must have been consummated meaning the.sexual act or the marital act happened.except in a josephine marriage this is.like mary and joseph.where the they go to the bishop and now.today they go to the bishop mary and.joseph didn't.but they live a life of pure chastity.and celibacy.that's a different topic for a different.time all right when you.have all of these these six things.you have a valid sacramental.indissoluble union this is what jesus.was talking about.so to summarize them all they fall into.three categories.the three things that you need present.for a true valid marriage.are the capacity to make the commitment.psychologically or physically.i have to have physical capacity to.engage in the marital act.i have to have the mental capacity to.treat my human spouse with dignity.consent the person must freely say yes.and not be.forced into it and then finally the.first one.canonical form married in the church.do you realize that the pope said.that probably over 50 percent of.catholic marriages in the united states.are invalid the pope said that.the probably over 50 percent of the.catholic marriages the united states are.invalid why.because they're not in the catholic.church therefore they're lacking.canonical form.and therefore they don't have the.element of the sacrament.that would be grounds for a.non-sacramental marriage all right.so let's go to the next slide how is.marriage entered into this is where it.really gets fascinating.the husband and the wife enter into vows.with each other which are greater than.promises.why vows involve greater accountability.and sacredness than promises.all right what do i mean by that all.right i might promise to cook you dinner.every single night.i could say to you you know.i'm gonna cook you dinner every night i.promise that's my promise to you.but sometimes rarely a certain.circumstance might come up.that i might have to break that promise.i might say oh my gosh.my provincial wanted to meet with me.tonight i'm sorry i can't cook dinner.but if i vow before god and others.that i will love and honor you all the.days of my life.and which is basically is what you do.at a wedding circumstances.should never cause me to break that vow.i am held to a greater accountability by.god.and the community that's what solemnvar.that's what vows are.almost all cultures hold vows as sacred.as compared to everyday promises.all right they often involve visible.signs.of the vowel like rings or for religious.sometimes you see them shave their head.in a tantrum they call it like p.fryer tuck right.vows are also a mirror of god's promises.to.us why are vows so powerful.because god they mirror god's promises.to us.through his covenants sending jesus.christ his son to earth.through the gospel the institution of.the church.god freely and deliberately committed to.us.so our vows mirror that so the catholic.marriage vows.are based on this.a mirror of god's commitment it's a.declaration of consent.the priest will ask you three questions.if you remember back to the day right.james and janet.have you come here to enter into.marriage without coercion.freely and wholeheartedly.and you answer i have meaning.free consent he says are you prepared as.you follow the path of marriage to love.and honor each other for as long as you.both shall live.and you say i have and you say are you.prepared to accept.children lovingly from god and bring.them up according to the law of christ.in his church.and you say i am or i have.that's the power of the vow but.we know certain circumcised circumcis.certain circumstances get in the way.this is our next slide what about this.is a divorce allowed by the catholic.church when all.else has failed everything tried father.i've tried everything to reconcile you.talk about all this love and these vows.father my spouse is completely distant.from me.he doesn't relate to me he's not present.to me he's failed in his obligations to.me.my spouse has abandoned me you're.telling me this my spouse.abuses me you're telling me the church.says i have to live with this.well let's talk about that.because it gets delicate.do i need to put my crash helmet back on.all right here's where it gets tricky.because let's look at the next slide.what does jesus say.jesus says they are no longer two.but one flesh therefore what god has.joined together.no human being must separate.matthew 19 6. i don't know about you but.i don't want to battle the words of.jesus.now the church has found ways to.accommodate those problems and still not.violate the words of jesus.you may not like the way the church does.it but let me tell you the church has.pushed.as far as it could in protection of.spouses who can't live together.and still not violate the words of.christ.christ's words are pretty firm there.it's almost like he's saying there's.unknown circumstances.he says nobody he says when god has.joined together.no human being will celebrate so what.about the civil.divorce when the state recognizes that a.couple is divorced by law.how does the church address that all.right this does not affect the.sacramental nature of the marriage.it defects the legal nature that's a.civil divorce.so there's still validity even after a.civil divorce.there's still the the validity of a.marriage.then why father chris did moses allow.divorce like we read.in the opening scripture passage why did.moses allow divorce remember jesus said.that it wasn't always that way.because of your hardness of heart but he.didn't explain fully and i want to share.with you why moses did.it was to provide legal protection to.the woman.so you see there's precedent here that.that one of the spouses needed to get.protection.now jesus said it was because of your.stubbornness he didn't mean the victim.he meant the one who's not taking care.of his spouse.so usually in a divorce there's usually.one person at fault.there's usually an innocent victim and.then there's usually one i thought now.that doesn't mean there can't be both.guilty.both could be guilty but there's always.one or both.that are responsible and jesus said that.here we have an innocent victim the.woman.who needed some legal protection the.greek word.apollo is translated divorce.actually means to relinquish a legal.right.so the reason moses allowed the divorce.is because if the husband was not going.to take care of her.he should let go of his right to her now.when i say right i'm not talking like.she's property.this is just the way it was in first.century palestine time of christ and.back.earlier to moses this allowed another.man to marry her and to provide for her.that was the way it was back then.jesus showed that a divorce was allowed.by moses not to be part of god's.original plan.but because of the stubbornness of the.spouse who wasn't taking care of his.other spouse.or his spouse so he's basically saying.that divorce is only tolerated.because of man's stubbornness and sin.so what jesus is saying here is it.wasn't god's plan to have it this way.but because.one spouse isn't taking care of the.other moses allowed it.and this is what the church is kind of.get getting involved in here.do you know divorce let's talk about.divorce for a little bit.do you know the divorce rate in the.united states is over 50 percent now and.you know the catholic rate of divorce is.actually about the same.as everyone else that's really.that's really yeah.we should reflect on that i do want to.tell you an interesting story that i.came across in doing my research that.one of my employees sent to me said.father chris you might want to mention.this in your talk tomorrow as i was.doing my research and i found it.fascinating let's pull up our next slide.this little town i'm croatian and this.is a town of.one hundred percent croatian catholics.it's called shiroki berger.and it's in bosnia full of croatian.catholics.now listen to this there's.26 000 people in this town look at how.beautiful that town is the beautiful.blue river and.the beautiful church there do you know.in the history of this town.they've never had a divorce it's.actually documented it's the only.divorce.free town in the world.they're 100 percent catholic now this is.interesting.why do you think that is well listen to.what they do at the wedding ceremony.i think this is fascinating at the.wedding ceremony the priest.blesses a crucifix presented to him.by the bride in the groom so the husband.and the wife they bring a crucifix.on their wedding day he places the.bride's right hand upon the crucifix.the priest then that of the groom's hand.over her hand and covers both their.hands with a stool.then the couple makes their vows.with their hands clasping the crucifix.now listen to this this is really.interesting.the priest then tells them that they.have found their ideal.partner now it's not all son and joy.here listen to this.they have found their ideal partner with.whom they must share their lives with.the following words.you have found your cross.[Laughter].it is a cross that you must bear.love and take with you every.day of your life know how.to appreciate you or excuse me to.appreciate it.because your cross will get you to.heaven.remember i just said one of the three.objectives of marriage is to get your.spouse to heaven.they then kiss it and put it up in their.home.showing their belief that a family must.be born.of the cross very interesting isn't it.but father you're still not covering the.fact that i've tried.everything everything.and it's just not working all right.we're getting there.but the first thing i have to cover.though is what about divorce is divorce.a sin.let's go to our next slide so is divorce.itself a sin.many say that divorce is not the sin.father it's marriage with remarriage.without an annulment.and in one sense that is very true.my sister is a perfect example i'll tell.you a little bit more about her in a.minute.so is divorce itself a sin.well maybe but not necessarily.what do i mean by that catechism 2384.says divorce is a grave offense against.the natural law.please don't beat me up here i'm reading.directly from the catechism.divorce is a grave offense against the.natural law it does injury to the.covenant of salvation.the church says that divorce can add to.the gravity.of an existing rupture because like.children are affected.and things like that 2385.in the catechism says divorce is immoral.also because it introduces disorder into.the family and into society.this disorder brings grave harm to the.deserted spouse.to children traumatized by the.separation of their parents.and because of its contagious effect.which takes which makes it truly a.plague on society.wow that's harsh.those are some pretty strong words but.that's the catechism.of the catholic church that is not me.that's not my opinion.okay but let's qualify this if you just.read that by itself and you are.unfortunately a victim of divorce.you might really be feeling bad right.now i don't want you to i want you to.keep listening okay.now this is harsh yes but jesus says in.verse 9.that god has joined what god has joined.let no.man put asunder so based on that verse.plus the catechism passage i just read.we can come to the conclusion that.divorce really may be.sinful in and of itself.however i.emphasize however one spouse may be.innocent maybe you are.completely innocent they tried to save.everything.but were abandoned in those cases.there is no sin let's talk about this.next slide paragraph.2686 let's read this.it can happen that.one of the spouses now this also comes.from the catechism.it can happen that one of the spouses is.the innocent.victim of a divorce decreed by civil law.this spouse therefore has not i.emphasize.has not contravened the moral law.that means you have not sinned there is.a considerable difference.between a spouse who has sincerely tried.to be.faithful to the sacrament of marriage.and is unjustly.abandoned and the one who through his.own grave fault destroys a canonically.valid.marriage wow.i think that's important you know my.sister i use as an example god bless my.sister.for 24 years she was a faithful wife.and her husband after 24 years of.marriage abandoned her for another woman.after he abandoned her for another woman.my sister said.oh my gosh i am guilty of the sin of.divorce.no you're not.i love my sister there's no way.god could hold my sister accountable.for that divorce she was traumatized.she was victimized and she was.put through let's face it hell i'm sorry.and and and we've both forgiven him we.pray for him.but that doesn't mean she has to carry.the burden.of guilt she's an innocent victim.all right so when is divorce allowed the.answer is when we have an innocent.victim.let's read the next slide paragraph 23.83 of the catechism.if civil divorce remains the only.possible way of.ensuring certain legal rights the care.of children.or the protection of an inheritance it.can be tolerated and does not constitute.a moral.offense okay.now guess what i found in canon law last.night.canon number 1153 paragraph.one listen to this if either of.the spouses causes grave mental.or psychological danger to the other.spouse.or to the offspring or otherwise renders.common life too difficult that spouse.gives the.other a legitimate cause for leaving.now personally i think if you read.further in canon law it's talking about.a separation.the church does teach that you should.first get permission from the bishop for.a separation.and then try to pray that things will.work out.so now if we have these types of.situations this begs the next.question can i receive holy communion.after a divorce.if divorce is not necessarily a sin as i.just read.we do know that marriage without an.annulment is.so there's more on that coming up but.indeed innocent divorced people can.receive holy communion those who cannot.are those who are remarried without an.annulment you know my sister let me go.back to her god bless her.do you know that i found out after her.divorce.that my sister wasn't receiving holy.communion.she said well the church teaches i'm.divorced i can't receive holy communion.i went oh.pam god bless you your heart is.so big but you can go to holy communion.she's like what no the church says i'm.divorced i can't go to holy communion no.pam you're the victim.you can go to holy communion you were.not the cause of that divorce.now her ex-spouse although.he caused the the because he caused the.divorce now he probably.shouldn't go to holy communion until.he's been to confession.and he's tried to reconcile back to the.church.you see the difference here all right.both parties may be guilty of the sin of.divorce.or maybe only one but usually someone is.so canon law as i said says best to.probably get permission.to separate first now the catechism does.say that if that doesn't work.then divorce could be allowed but.only for protection like legal rights or.i think in extreme abuse cases things.like that.now some people point out what about.unchastity father.doesn't in one of the scripture passages.jesus say or the case of unchastity.people always take that to mean my space.was unfaithful.actually in chastity means an invalid.marriage not adultery.and so an invalid marriage is this whole.thing we've been talking about.those six conditions that i said that.make a marriage valid.that i just put up on the slide about 10.minutes ago.in this case these people should split.anyway because they weren't validly.married to begin with.all right now let's get into the tricky.parts.what if you don't feel the love for the.person anymore.is that a valid reason for divorce let's.say.everything else there's no major abuse.or or problems but you just don't feel.in love anymore.is that a valid reason actually please.don't beat me up actually the church.says.no wow father that's hard.well as i said in my promo video love is.not just an emotion the church teaches.thomas aquinas tells us that love is an.act of the will.i choose to love you emotions go up and.down.if we were to to to end every.relationship when.our emotions went down i'd never talk to.my parents again.if i was to go on every time an emotion.went up or down and when it hit the down.i would never talk to my best friend.again.because you're gonna have those pitfalls.they're going to go through especially.in the pandemic the.the issues of of of emotions are going.up and down like like a.seismograph but remember.the choice to love your spouse to will.their.good is your responsibility to death do.you.part that's where sometimes it gets hard.i realize that.but even if your feelings change.and even if you can't live with them you.can still pray for them and have that.act of the will for their good.all right jesus teaches discipleship.is not to include concessions for.sinfulness like i want to go with.someone else.just the fact that you want to go with.someone else.doesn't give us the right to do that.i know it's hard we may feel that way.jesus shows marriage is between a man.and a woman for.life those aren't my words it's the.gospel.and genesis the book of genesis even.says that so the ideal.is to focus on the beauty of marriage.rather than only on divorce.divorce here jesus now.one of the things he did is he restored.to its original purity.the dignity of man and woman in marriage.this is what jesus did instituted by god.at the beginning of time.beginning of creation therefore divorce.is excluded and remarriages become.adultery jesus said unless.it's unlawful this is the one thing.that we have to get in mind i'm going to.show that in a minute.but father again what do i do.i can't this marriage can't go on okay.again the church gets that and maybe you.actually have a non-valid marriage.maybe your marriage never really did.exist in the first place now we pray.that's not the case.you should always pray that marriage.works every marriage is assumed to be.valid unless it's the annulment process.the decree of.nullity proves it otherwise so let's.talk about this.father let's look at our next slide am i.able to get an annulment.again i'm using the word annulment.synonymous with decree of nullity which.is more proper term.all right but here is what we have to.ask ourselves let's go to the next slide.all right jesus said.i say to you whoever divorces his wife.hears the key words these are the words.of jesus.unless the marriage is unlawful.and marries another commits adultery.that's matthew 5 32 so this is the key.word what does unlawful mean.it means that the marriage didn't follow.the legal requirements.church legal now not civil legal for a.valid marriage.here's the important thing remember an.annulment is not a catholic divorce.there is no such thing but rather an.official.statement that at least one of the.requirements that i put up on the screen.those six things.for a valid sacramental marriage were.not present.at the time of the marriage so if you.remember those six things.somebody's not open to life you got.married and that person never agreed to.be open to life.that's one of the conditions for.marriage missing.somebody doesn't have the psychological.or physical capacity.to engage in the union like the marital.act impatiency.um that's a grounds that the marriage.was never valid.or that it there was not free consent.you held a shotgun.to the spouse that you're now married to.and she's scared to death and says yes.okay i'll marry you.that's not a valid marriage if any of.those things existed there were six of.them i listed.then you may not have a valid marriage.it wasn't present at the time of the.wedding something that should have been.present.wasn't so a valid catholic.sacramental marriage can be.dissolved if one of those requirements.is not present even if the civil.government.says you are divorced so.if they are all present you.can't separate it can't be dissolved if.all of those things that i listed on.those.those number six things if they're all.present the marriage can't be dissolved.jesus says unless it's unlawful that.means if one of those six things i.listed are not.present then it's not lawful.and that means there wasn't a valid.marriage to begin with.now remember what were those six things.just to refresh your memory for the.sacrament or the sacramental marriage.that you got married within the church.if you were baptized catholic.all right when you or you married.another baptized christian.that you freely consented right that you.understood what.marriage is that you were open to life.that you had the tent to be faithful.from the beginning that you had the.psychological and physical ability.to carry out the duties of marriage.like the marital act if any one of these.are missing.you may have grounds for an annulment.this is important now.an annulment or a decree of nullity.again.acknowledges that until the annulment.is given marriage is assumed.to be valid that's why any.children that come from your union are.not.illegitimate all marriages are put.are marriages that are assumed to be.valid until the decree comes that this.marriage is invalid.it is assumed that it is valid so your.children who were born before the.annulment.were born under the idea that this.marriage was valid.and they are not illegitimate it's one.of the big.misconceptions now do you know this is.interesting.94 of petitions for annulments in the.u.s.are granted 94.john paul actually called it into.question.he thought it actually was way too many.do you know the united states that we.only have six percent of the world's.catholics.right there's there's um.in the world there's a billion catholics.and there's 60 million catholics in the.united states.right we're about 25 of the population.we're the main.religion in the united states there's.350 million.so um we're about 60 million catholics.that means 60 million out of a billion.we're six percent of the catholics but.do you know that we account for.70 of the annulments worldwide.so only six percent of the catholics in.the u.s get 70.of the annulments i thought that was.interesting.do you know in uh just a few years ago i.haven't gotten updated numbers but back.in 2006.in the us there were 27 000 marriages.that were declared null do you know how.many there were in 1968.338..wow let's pray.let's pray for our families our.marriages.so that's why i want to go to the next.slide a declaration.of nullity or what i've been calling an.annulment.is not the dissolving of an existing.marriage.but rather a determination that consent.was never given by either spouse and.thus a marriage.never existed consent can be.lacking due to different factors that i.just read to you.like you're trying to marry somebody to.gain citizenship or it's a shotgun.wedding but it also.can be deceit if you married somebody.that totally lied to you.that they were a totally different.person they were living a double life.like we hear these spouses all the time.that father oh my gosh i found out that.my husband was leading a completely.double life he was.you know procuring uh homosexual.prostitutes.and had this other family and was doing.all this that.that's deceit and that actually means.you didn't give free consent because you.didn't know the whole truth.it's actually grounds for.non-sacramental marriage and therefore.an annulment or a decree of nullity.even if you don't plan to remarry.now this is interesting this came to me.realization talking to an employee.yesterday.and i confirmed it with our provincial.do you know my sister who got the.divorce.she never went to get the annulment.because she said well i'm not going to.remarry.i'm not going to get an annulment.because i don't plan on remarrying ever.i don't need an annulment and at first.here i'm the priest and at first i said.well.yeah you're right but it took an.employee to point out to me and then i.confirmed it with.my superior there's actually more to it.you know you probably might want to prey.on maybe getting that annulment anyway.even if you don't plan any on remarrying.why because it frees you from that.spiritual bond.that still exists between you and that.person because it's never been declared.not a marriage so in the spiritual realm.you have still have that spiritual bond.and that spiritual bond could be helping.or hurting you.so you might if you really feel it's.important to break free you might want.to consider getting that annulment and.you know what else in the case of my.sister.this is public knowledge so i'm not.revealing anything that's private.but her ex-husband went and married.another woman.outside the church he's living with her.technically he's committing the sin of.adultery against my sister.because he's still married to her.technically.so i said i'm going to talk to my sister.and say you know you might want to.consider getting the annulment.to actually help free him from that.extra sin now it's still fornication.he's still having relations with this.woman not being validly married but.at least you could take out the sin of.adultery.if you get the annulment because.fornication is where you have.relations between non-married people but.adultery is where you have relations.with a married person.and technically he's still married to my.sister.so we might want to consider getting.that annulment.to free that extra burden.i mean that would be an act of charity.i'm not saying that you have to i'm just.saying pray on that.pray on that very interesting you know.even if you don't plan you may want to.get that enormous to loosen the bonds.now remember what about this father i.can't get an annulment my ex-spouse will.absolutely be furious well.actually technically your ex-spouse does.not have to agree.to be part of the annulment process the.annulment process can continue even if.your spouse is completely uncooperative.it doesn't matter it helps but your.ex-spouse does not have to agree with.the annulment process it will still move.forward.now i've been talking about all the.marriages today that are valid.well father then then then what do you.talk about all these other marriages.well all the marriages that are either.natural or.or sacramental are are assumed to be.between.a man and a woman that's what christ.says in the gospels that's what genesis.says.so any marriage that is non-monogamous.in other words polygamy.people with multiple lot wives or.non-heterosexual marriages.which are not marriages or non-human.spouses like animals crazy i know but.people are marrying.dogs and different things these are not.even an invalid.marriage they're not even a marriage at.all.this is an invalid attempt at marriage.according to the natural law.so no annulment is even needed because.there's not even a marriage to declare.null there's it's not even it's not even.it didn't even reach that point so this.is this is another important thing.all right so the two things that make a.marriage.valid if you want to boil it down are.i should say three are consent meaning.you did it willingly.capacity meaning you had the ability.psychological.maturity to do it and that you had.proper.form or you followed the law meaning you.were married in the church.i know this is a lot and god help us all.to understand this.but it does make sense if you think.about it all right.now let's go back and let's go to the.next slide.the next slide are what are the.impediments.to getting married all right so these.are two full slides stay with me.now sometimes a person enters into a.marriage.with full consent that i just said was a.requirement.and they had proper form they got.married in the church.and they had the right capacity they.were mentally.fully capable of fulfilling the.obligation of a marriage and.treating their spouse with respect but.there is something in their background.that makes the marriage not possible.it's called an impediment.if any of these exist pretty much.the annulment is a rubber stamp because.the the marriage should never have.happened in the first place let's put.them up on the screen.these are called impediments to marriage.so let's look at this one.one or both of the parties is below the.minimum.age of 16 for males or 14 for females.wow that seems kind of low to me but.okay that's what the church teaches.two impotence meaning that the male is.not.able to physically engage in the marital.act meaning he can't actually even do.the act this is different.than being sterile sterile means you can.do the act but you can't produce.children that's acceptable but impotence.if you marry.a spouse and they didn't tell you they.were impotent and then you found out on.the marriage night that they were.completely impotent.that means there was an impediment to.marriage that you were not told about.and therefore grounds that the marriage.didn't didn't happen.all right number three being already.married.this could be deceit you could be told.by somebody i want to marry you honey.and you get married and you find out oh.my goodness he was married prior.that's an impediment you can't get.married if you were married before.all right what about one party is.catholic and the other.hasn't been baptized.unless you get permission that is an.impediment.you have to as a baptized catholic.marries somebody who's baptized now they.don't have to be catholic.you marry a baptist but they have to be.baptized.all right the next one number five the.man.was ordained to holy orders.that means that as a priest i cannot go.marry.somebody if i'm in holy orders now.somebody said well what about that.priest on fox news father.he got leia sized if the priest gets.leosized and.removed from his vows or his his.ordination then yes he can do that.not good i don't think but but.nonetheless all right let's go to the.next slide number six these are the.impediments.either party made a public perpetual vow.of chastity in a religious institute.so i have a double thing there i've also.made.vows perpetual vows of chastity.so i cannot get married i have an.impediment to getting married.it's probably a good thing for most.ladies out there.all right number seven.impediment of crime what does that mean.that means.that if you brought about the death of.your spouse.or the spouse of another so that you.could marry them.that would be like the guy killing the.spouse of a woman.so that he could marry her that's a huge.impediment.all right last two are two big words.khan saying unity.that's basically incest can't marry.somebody of.blood relation and then surprisingly an.interesting one is affinity number nine.where you can't marry someone who's.related to you by marriage closely.like for instance if a man.marries a woman who has a daughter from.a previous.marriage and all the sudden he gets.divorced from her he can't marry the.daughter.because he's already been married to the.mother and affinity says.there's too close a relationship even.though it's by marriage and not by blood.so khan saying uiti is by blood affinity.is by marriage all right.let's keep going here so the church.basically wants to make sure that a.person.does it the right way that he has full.consent.and he follows the law or the form of.the church by getting married in the.catholic church.but the church also wants to ensure that.people.are able to enter into a marriage bond.that they don't have these.impediments like they were only 10 when.they got married.those those laws those those marriages.aren't valid either.so let's go through this why is it.that the church does that because the.next slide.the family is a mirror of the trinity.that is why we do this the family is the.mirror of the trinity and this is what i.said in my preview video the other day.because you know um we know we have a.god that is one.we have one god but our god is in three.persons.father son and holy spirit and we know.that you know the highest element of.anything that we can do is love.and i always like to ask my catechism.class hey guys.if you were the only person that ever.existed nobody else ever existed just.you.could there be love and the answer is no.in order to have love you need a.community of persons.and who is god god is love well wait a.minute if god was the only person who.ever.existed there and he was for a long time.could there be love well no only if.there was one person.but god is three persons.that's why god is a trinity because.there has to be a.a community of persons to share love.saint augustine tells us this father.you're making this up no i'm not this.comes from augustine saint augustine.says.that in the trinity we have the perfect.love.between persons you have the father god.the father the lover.you have god the son the beloved and the.love between them is so.great that from it proceeds a third.person.the third person the child.so in that picture look at the family.who is the family.let's pull that slide back up that.family is the the.mirror oh did we lose it okay we're down.oh okay sorry um i i didn't know if we.got cut off from our live stream.um but the family is the mirror of the.trinity you have the husband the lover.the son the excuse me the husband the.lover the wife the beloved.and the love between them is so great.that from it comes a third person the.child.this is what makes our faith so.beautiful.all right now let's keep going here and.i want to wrap up.so anyway this is the holy family with.the holy family we see god wanting to.live within the human family.this is the revelation of god's will in.the christian married couples.to take it seriously remember lucia said.the final battle between god and satan.will be over marriage and the family.so it's not too late put yourself right.go see your priest talk to your priest.ask him how i can make it right do i.need my marriage blessed do i need it.convalidated which just means.you were married but it wasn't in the.church now you want to get right with.the church.that's called convalidation go back go.to confession.get an annulment if you have to have.these things done.a couple can renew their vows at another.church.but you can't get remarried at another.church.just get married in that catholic church.remember go see your priest he can help.you send you to the bishop.this is why god set it up as a beautiful.gift of all all.christians but especially us in our.catholic faith the beautiful gift of.marriage all right i want to finish.now with the most famous.passage that every priest shudders from.when he's told this and i want to.i want to give this example because this.is a beautiful.example of something that's.misunderstood in the church let's look.at our next slide.wives be subordinate.to your husbands this.is interesting because every priest.shudders when he has to talk about this.let's listen to ephesians 5.verse 21-25 be subordinate to one.another out of reverence for christ.meaning the husband.and to the wife and the wife to the.husband.wives should be subordinate to their.husbands.as to the lord for the husband is head.of his wife just as christ is head of.the church.he himself the savior of the body.as the church however is subordinate to.christ.so wives should be subordinated to their.husbands and everything.but husbands love your wives.even to the point of death as christ.loved the church.and handed himself over for her so.i want to tackle this because i think.it's beautiful.and i know i'm running out of time but.if the husband is the head.in the marriage which it just said for.the husband.is head of his wife just as christ is.head of the church.how can there be true equality all right.the greek word for head is cup fale.which doesn't mean boss it means one who.brings.fulfillment and we're getting closer.this is the same word.used to describe christ as head of the.church which is his body.the head and the body are one like the.unity of.husband and wife they depend on each.other.for fullness so the word kept folly.doesn't mean boss it means to bring.fullness now men be careful here.you can't exploit this passage i.remember my dad used to elbow my mom.in church when they would read wise be.submissive to your husbands.he's getting it wrong he's missing it.you got skin in the game too man.because paul says men love your wives to.the point of death as christ loved the.church.and so husband and wife are really.subject to each other that was the first.line in the passage.be subject to each other just in.different ways.a wife subjects herself to her husband.by accepting his role as the head.what does that mean that means that she.cooperates with him in filling that role.of service to her and her children.now the husband in return subjects.himself.first to god and then by his to his wife.by accepting her need for love and to.care for her to.the point that he would give his life so.this is.mutual subjection it's not.slavish this is what the church teaches.now ephesians 5 21 says be subject to.one another out of reverence for christ.so here the husband this is important.signifies christ and the wife.signifies the church so.the woman when it says to subject.yourself to your husband what does it.mean.it means submit to husband in his role.as christ but then the husband as.christ has submitted to his rule.as christ did to the church his bride.so the husband submits to his wife like.christ did the church.his bride women should submit.to like the church to christ because she.is like the church.and men should sacrifice like christ.for the church this is beautiful.so headship of the husband is not about.worldly power.or degradation of the wife god.created both male and female so they.have different but complementary and.equal rules.today we don't have that anymore there's.no.more male or female functions they're.completely wiping that out.everything's gender neutral and everyone.should have the same role.there isn't this isn't true men and.women are different but.equal you know i used to watch the shows.my three favorite shows were.everybody loves raymond home improvement.in the simpsons.back in my former days before being a.priest i loved those three shows until.later i realized.you know what all three of those have in.common they're making the buffoon.out of the husband the father he's the.idiot.and everybody loves raymond home.improvement in the simpsons and every.one of them.the father isn't the leader he's not the.head and this is to me.kind of the destructive way society.today wants to destroy the nuclear.family.what are the movements and some of these.protests are to destroy.the written manifesto of some of these.organizations in.in charge of this anarchy are saying.destroy the nuclear family destroy the.patriarchy.this is the way god set it up who are we.to destroy what god established.this leads to chaos and not ordering in.in marriage or in society when there's.no family leader.that's not the case now an example that.i want to give to finish with.is what i equate i read this once a long.time ago and i'm.sorry i don't give credit to where.credit is due but a long time ago i read.a comparison of marriage to ballroom.dancing.now this is amazing because in ballroom.dancing there's no true leader.i'm sorry if there is no true leader it.won't work.let's watch this 15 second clip and.please watch.both the man and the woman in this clip.okay so in that clip the leading the man.was doing the leading in the dancing but.that was only.one function following.the woman was a different but equal.and as important function.it is reciprocal or complementary.one isn't better than the other they are.both needed both the husband and the.wife are subject to christ.like the man and the woman in that video.were subject to the music.a woman can't submit though however men.if you're stepping all over her toes.during the dance.so men you have to let the woman be.herself.the man can't step all over the woman's.toes now.in a marriage a woman can't also submit.if that abusive husband doesn't follow.the music.how can you be men out there if you're.not following the music of god.your wife can't follow and so this is.important in the same way.men you can't lead if your wife is.pushing you all around the dance floor.ladies.all right so in marriage the husband.can't lead the family.with a perpetually.just domineering wife who doesn't allow.him to lead and vice versa.the wife can't follow if the husband is.perpetually abusive.they have to work together both need to.let the holy spirit lead them in faith.like the music.led the couple in the dance otherwise.there can be no dance and no christian.marriage.if you choose marriage like that dance.the husband accepts the.responsibility to lead and the wife to.follow.one is not better than the other it's.it's it's.powerful as we read here we must live as.god wills.not as we will so i want to finish by.saying the catholic church is not.anti-women.you know it's it's a it's equality.um jesus loved women he befriended women.in fact many supported him in his.ministry.a cloistered nun is actually a higher.calling than a diocesan priest.not based on that he can do the mass of.course that's the highest but.in the way of life because because that.calling is higher she can't be a priest.only because.the priest is in persona christie and.christ was a man.has nothing to do with a woman being.inferior in fact again a cloistered nun.is a higher calling.all right jesus also followed the rules.of the family.that god gave now do you remember the.holy family.who was the most important jesus who was.next.important mary who was least important.joseph but who was the head of the of.the holy family.joseph because by virtue of being the.father.the husband this is what we have to say.now.pope john paul ii said authentic.love requires that a man have profound.respect for the equal dignity of his.wife.you are not her master but her husband.she was not given to you to be your.slave but your wife reciprocate her.attentiveness to you.and be grateful for her love that was.john paul ii the catechism.says for if the man is the head.the woman is the heart.and as he occupies the chief place in.leading.she ought to claim for herself the chief.place.in love all right so the last couple.comments but.if a husband is not a husband who lays.down his life for his bride.and puts her ahead of himself he has no.business.pointing to that passage saying be.submissive to me.because he has skin in the game and when.wives are told to be subject to their.husbands.it has nothing to do with status two.persons can be equal in status.but subordinate one to the other look at.the trinity.were the father son and holy spirit.equal yes they were.but the son subordinated himself to the.father.that doesn't mean he was inferior that's.not what the church means.when it says that passage in infinite in.in ephesians.in the trinity all three were equal but.the son was subordinated to the father.and the holy spirit was subordinated to.the son.all right god bless you all you know sub.mission.sub means under doesn't mean less than.so.submission means putting yourself under.your husband's mission.and what's your husband's mission you.remember the three objectives of.marriage.get your spouse to heaven so your.husband.this is true love is on a mission to get.you to heaven.and you have to follow in that mission.that's not a bad thing.it means allowing him to serve you as.head of your household.that service is for protection not.domination men.you don't dominate it's like the secret.service what is their job their job is.to protect the president.not to dominate him it's the same in.marriages.so wives give your husbands a chance.if he fails then you take over and some.of you i'm sure many of you have had to.do that.god bless you and may the grace of.almighty god help you in that endeavor.but you might find giving your support.your husband will lead we pray for them.and maybe just maybe your family will.flourish.you know most situations come.that are hard to understand why a family.didn't work out.but by the grace of god the spouse.remaining can do.everything they can to make it work.my heart goes out to every one of you.spouses who is made at work.with or without your other spouse and we.pray.that all marriages that are struggling.right now.may be brought into the graces of god.and be healed.and that's why i want to show you the.last two slides if.through all this trust stress of daily.life.you have any problems i want you to show.you the national domestic.hotline if in any way you are a victim.of abuse.or an abusive spouse or significant.other.please 1-800 1-800-779-7233.is the word safe give them a call.they can help you or text love is.to 22522 to get the help you need.or online you can chat at thehotline.org.if you are the victim of abuse we pray.you aren't we pray that there will be.healing if you are and you know what.father you know i'm not a victim of.abuse but my marriage really is in.trouble it's just.the love seems lacking we're not praying.together we're not staying together.we're doing our own thing we don't.communicate anymore i don't even see my.spouse much.or maybe in the pandemic you see him too.much that's our last slide.the usccb has put up some marriage help.it's called.for your marriage.org this is sanctioned.by the church.a beautiful ministry for resources for a.happy.and holy marriage so please.visit for your marriage.org.to get these resources so you know what.everybody.thank you for joining me i apologize.again i went long i'm going to start.trying after this to start.chopping these times down but god bless.you i'm trying to give you the entire.teaching of the church on some of the.most important topics.and i thank you for your patience so god.bless.all of you and for all the marriages out.there or those who are struggling trying.to survive.with a failed marriage or of marriage.excuse me not failed but a marriage that.has been dissolved.we pray for you and we ask that you.remain strong in your faith.and may almighty god bless all of you.and marriages in the name of the father.and of the son.and of the holy spirit amen and god.bless you.why be a marian helper because we mary.and father.celebrate a mass for you and all our.members each.and every day you can share in all the.prayers.good works and merits of all the miriam.priests and brothers around the world.and now you can share the graces just as.if you were a marian priest or brother.every all souls day we see a mass for.all the deceased members of the.association of marian helpers.again there's no way that after we die.we can help ourselves.but we have to rely on the prayers of.those here on earth.and we members of the marian fathers.will be praying for you.as a deceased member of our association.you can share in the graces of the.perpetual novena.to the divine mercy remember jesus told.saint faustina that the chaplet of.divine mercy.is one of the most powerful prayers we.can make and every day here at the.shrine of divine mercy we pray it.and you can share in those graces so if.you have any questions or you want to.learn more how to be.a marian helper please visit.micprayers.com.or call 1-800-462-7426.and let me personally pray for you.and your loved ones thank you and may.almighty god bless you the father.the son and the holy spirit amen.you.

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Annulment Visa Form FAQs

Check the below common problems about Annulment Visa Form. Communicate with directly if you still have other queries.

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How do I fill out the New Zealand visa form?

Hi, Towards the front of your Immigration Form there is a check list. This check list explains the documents you will need to include with your form (i.e. passport documents, proof of funds, medical information etc). With any visa application it’s important to ensure that you attach all the required information or your application may be returned to you. The forms themselves will guide you through the process, but you must ensure you have the correct form for the visa you want to apply for. Given that some visa applications can carry hefty fees it may also be wise to check with an Immigration Adviser or Lawyer as to whether you qualify for that particular visa. The form itself will explain which parts you need to fill out and which parts you don’t. If you don’t understand the form you may wish to get a friend or a family member to explain it to you. There is a part at the back of the form for them to complete saying that they have assisted you in the completion of it. If all else fails you may need to seek advice from a Immigration Adviser or Lawyer. However, I always suggest calling around so you can ensure you get the best deal.

How do I fill out the German student visa form?

I would suggest to fill it digitally with the help of adobe Fill and Sign. It would represent great impression as it would look nice and Tidy. All the Best !

How do I fill out the application for a Schengen visa?

Dear Rick, A Schengen visa application form requires the information about your passport, intended dates and duration of visit, sponsor’s or inviting person's details, previous schengen visa history etc. If you have these details with you, it is very easy to fill out the visa application.

How do I schedule a US visa interview of two people together after filling out a DS160 form?

Here is a link that might help answer your question >> DS-160: Frequently Asked Questions For more information on this and similar matters, please call me direct: 650.424.1902 Email: heller@hellerimmigration.com Heller Immigration Law Group | Silicon Valley Immigration Attorneys

What is considered gross insubordination in the workplace?

U.S. perspective The legal meaning of “insubordination” is the same as that word’s everyday meaning[1]: defiance of authority; refusal to obey orders. Perhaps this question is being asked in the context of employment discipline or termination. I am not aware of any employment laws that define “insubordination”, and it makes sense that there would be no such laws: There is no benefit from trying to tie down a legal definition for a behavioral matter that inherently is so fact-specific. Any such definition likely would be both insufficiently precise and insufficiently broad. Footnotes [1] meaning insubordination - Google Search

What is it called when employees refuse to work?

Well, no. They can’t be fired, because they are already unemployed. They don’t have a job to be fired from. However, their unemployment checks will stop coming if they refuse a job offer.

Can you refuse to do a task at work?

Can I refuse to do a task at work? I really wish people would stop asking “can” and start asking “should” questions. “Can” tells you nothing. Of course you can say no. What matters is why, and what the ramifications of saying no are. If you refuse to do a task because: You are lazy, that’s a poor reason to refuse It is illegal or hazardous, that’s a great reason to refuse If your boss will fire you for refusing and it’s a task within the scope of your normal responsibilities at work, that’s a fantastically unwise thing to refuse “Can” is a useless question: should is a much better question, and that Continue Reading

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